LARGO AL FACTOTUM

Hey, is this blog on?

But seriously folks, this whole "blogging" thing is getting out of hand. Time was when I was the only person I knew who read blogs - hell, who even knew what a blog was. This was way back in the misty dawn of time - early 2002, if memory serves. Back then you could count the number of blogs out there on one hand, practically, especially if you were one of those lucky-duck polydactyly types who have like 22 fingers. Flash-forward five years, and I read that now there are like 5.7 weblogs for every man, woman, and child in the Western Hemisphere. The market is saturated; there are terabytes of useless text floating around the web, and of course we know from economics that the more readily available a commodity, the less valuable it becomes.

What I'm saying is, this blog is essentially worthless. Worse, if you consider the opportunity cost of time spent writing in the ether, time that could have been put to use at some salutary activity like lobbying for human rights in the Sahel, or anal bleaching. It's just as bad for you, and shame on you for reading as far as you have. So please, I beg you, STOP RIGHT NOW AND SAVE YOURSELF FROM THE SIREN SONG OF THE WEBLOG!!! KILL YOUR INTERNET!!!! ATTICA!!!! ATTICA!!!! ATTICA!!!!


You still there? Good.

The fact is, I have a very good reason for creating this weblog, and her name is Ilene. Ilene and I are old college friends who have recently become roommates, and the hue and cry for a blog chronicling our exploits has reached - dare I say it? - a deafening roar. Herewith, then, the tale of two young hopefuls: a nice Jewish girl from the North Shore, and a not-so-nice Gentile boy from the heathen Northwest Suburbs, living in the treacherous slums of one of Chicago's toniest neighborhoods. Season liberally with a cadre of friends and associates the envy of any Russian organized crime syndicate, garnish with the ever-present threat of financial ruin (at least for me), and you have a dish that is... delightful? Exquisite? Boring as an eight-day cricket test match for the blind? As yet no one knows, but when I find out, you will too.